Monday, February 28, 2011

Here is a Bit of Old New York



"Porno Paradise" by Roudou Dou


When I moved to the city, Times Square was all porn shops, empty theatres and strung-out hookers.
Giuliani started the clean-up. Mayor Mike continued to the point where it's now stores found in any American mall, patio furniture on Broadway and adults dressed as Elmo, Cookie Monster and SpongeBob Square Pants.
There're a few porn shops left like Show World—which is officially part of the Times Square Arts Center featuring stand-up comedy and 'Improv 4 Kids.' And the internet was also a big factor in the clean-up. Now people download porn in the comfort of their own home and hookers work through Craig's List.
There's something sad about the lack of public sleaze in the city. Our only hope is that those Elmos and Cookie Monsters are really hookers trying to turn tricks as they pose for photos with tourists from France.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

The Best a Man Can Get


This is a billboard on Crosby and Broome in SoHo. It’s Derek Jeter—in case you didn’t recognize him—I didn’t at first—and it was hand-painted last week. Derek had a five o’clock shadow then.


The next day, Derek was lathered up by the painters. The day after he was shaved clean.
And then the stubble appeared again. And he was lathered again. Then shaved.
This will continue until March 6th. Every day two painters will show up and groom the six-story face of the Yankees Captain. Every day they’ll apply black paint, white paint and flesh-colored paint to his upper lip, jaw and chin—carefully matching it to the print-out from BBDO.
The official term for this is ‘advertecture.’
And this is why Gillette blades are so expensive.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

American Standard


It’s ‘Pay What You Wish’ at the Guggenheim on Saturdays from 5:45 to 7:45

My friend Liz Heeden said that it’s impossible to take a bad picture of the Guggenheim Museum. I agree, but I also think it’s impossible to take a photo of the Guggenheim that’s not s cliché.
The Guggenheim is the only Frank Lloyd Wright building in New York City (he hated the place), but the millionaires of Fifth Avenue weren’t happy about it. They thought that Wright (a socialist) designed it to look like a toilet as an elaborate joke on the wealthy.